Gore I am!3 min read

Forwards Humor Misc Politics

This wandered its way around the internet following Al Gore’s loss for his presidential bid which had a crap load of screwed up ballot counts in Florida. It was most definitely funny at the time. I give props to Al Gore now. He has gone on to do some great work since that time. This was posted on my original website as well.


Can we count them with our nose?
Can we count them with our toes?
Should we count them with a band?
Should we count them all by hand?

If I do not like the count,
I will simply throw them out!
I will not let this vote count stand
I do not like them, AL GORE I am!

Can we change these numbers here?

Can we change them, calm my fears?
What do you mean, Dubya has won?
This is not fair, this is not fun

Lets count them upside down this time
Lets count until the state is mine!

I will not let this VOTE count stand!
I do not like it, AL GORE I am!

I’m really ticked, I’m in a snit!

You have not heard the last of it!

I’ll count the ballots one by one
And hold each one up to the sun!
I’ll count, recount, and count some more!

You’ll grow to hate this little chore

But I will not, cannot let this vote count stand!
I do not like it, Al Gore I am!

I won’t leave office, I’m stayin’ here!
I’ve glued my desk chair to my rear!

Tipper, Hillary, and Bubba too,
all telling me that I should sue!

We find the Electoral College vile!
RECOUNT the votes until I smile!

We do not want this vote to stand!

We do not like it, AL GORE I am!

How shall we count this ballot box?
Let’s count it standing in our socks!

Shall we count this one in a tree?

And who shall count it, you or me?

We cannot, cannot count enough!

We must not stop, we must be tough!

I do not want this vote to stand!
I do not like it AL GORE I am!

I’ve counted till my fingers bleed!

And still can’t fulfill my counting need!
I’ll count the tiles on the floor!
I’ll count, and count, and count some more!

And I will not say that I am done!

Until the counting says I’ve won!

I will not let this vote count stand!
I do not like it, AL GORE I am!

What’s that? What?
What are you trying to say?
You think the current count should stay?
You do not like my counting scheme?
It makes you tense, gives you bad dreams?
Foolish people, you’re wrong you’ll see!
You’re only care should be for me!

I WILL NOT LET THIS VOTE COUNT STAND!

I DO NOT LIKE IT. AND AL GORE I AM!

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